The Aucklanders of MKRNZ: How cool is it to live on the Shore?

mkr

“Hey guys, this is a group called AQUA. Have you heard them? Awesome, come on in and smash some drinks”

 

In terms of great reality television quotes of Western Civilization, “How cool is it to live on the Shore” deserves a prize.

Doesn’t it.

Tonight on My Kitchen Rules New Zealand, the Corporate Dads, Aaron and Josh take helm at the galley, promising us ‘big flavours and big proteins’.

Big proteins, saucy rubs.  Do these guys ever practise talking in the mirror first?

One of them sells male potency solutions.  The other is a national sales manager at some form of a Holdings company.  They shift the units by day and become wonderdads at night.

They wear suits.  There’s nothing you can teach them.  They talk a big game and they likely catch  – big game.

They know.

They like to haul seafood out of the Hauraki Gulf of an evening and serve it fresh to their children.  With chips.

On the bookshelves: The Secret, essays by Jamie Whyte and Gunnar Peterson workout DVDs.

In the CD player:  Lazy Sunday.

On the deck – an elliptical trainer and Men’s Health – the abs edition.  A half cup of Jarrah, steaming in the North Shore sunlight.

Nearby, Tracey and Neil.  Tracey and Neil are the Beauty and the Beast pairing.  Vignettes prior to their cook-up showed them on photoshoots and throwing shapes, North Shore styles.

How cool is it to live on the Shore?

I guess your longitude is slightly higher than the South Shore.  I’m not Shore.

They’re competing with a nice bunch.  The scoring is off the chart, with the young, blonde, lesbian Christchurch Cuties* receiving very fair gradings considering their difficult salmon fillets and chocolate pudding which failed to deliver saucy ooze.

But Ian and Sandie were ok with that.

“I was happy with our 69.”

said Sandie.

Ian put Same Love on his playlist.  Well played.

And so to the kitchen, Aaron and Josh.  These big proteins you speak of scare me, but I’m intrigued despite this.

In the ratings war, MKR is king.

 

 

 

 

*My favourites.

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