Category Archives: Reality TV

The Dating Game: The Bachelor New Zealand Finale

I’ve sat through the second season of The Bachelor—like everyone else who has bothered to watch—with a sense of despondency, shame, bemusement and stupefaction. It’s nothing like the first series, with the strapping, amusing Art Green who—despite being some sort of MediaWorks plant (probably)—at least had an inner spark greater than a Bic lighter. Jordan is okay. At the end… Read more »

#DWTSNZ — The First Half

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Dancing With the Stars shows us how quickly life moves on after a big and traumatic event like the final of Campbell Live. But. I think this is a great show for New Zealand. It’s so ‘New Zealand’. Dancing with the Stars is a fresh baked stack of pikelets on a Crown Lynn plate. It’s different entertainment than, say, The… Read more »

The Chase

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Of a weekday, you get The Chase after your “Maori News”. I’ve always watched Te Karere, always. I love it. It makes me feel like a proper New Zealander, unlike when I watch the news at 6pm. And then, The Chase. Danny from Coronation Street, with his frankly illegal eyelashes, shard-like blue eyes, and hilarious patter ushers out some of… Read more »

Reality TV Scenarios: The Cat Fight

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Why would we spend valuable time analyzing The Bachelor New Zealand at all? It seems that an inevitable outcome of manufactured television these days is manufactured conflict. Come on, now. Have you ever watched one of those seasons of Survivor where they all get along and cry when someone gets voted off the island? There’s a certain incongruence in that…. Read more »

Drunk in Love: The Bachelor 2015

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I am really feeling for the families of the TVNZ show, Our First Home, tonight. After the shit storm of X Factor (which it clashes with on several nights), I was thinking how such a show — one that is ostensibly quite asinine, family orientated and tedious — at least has warmth, unlike the pit-viper infested environment of the glittery… Read more »

The Bachelor New Zealand 2015

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  What we all need after the divisive election result — of The Block — is something to unify us as a nation. For me that is pretty much it.  Last year was so depressing, really, with the politics and all the other shit, and I am looking forward to some fresh perspectives, and lo!, MediaWorks TV have delivered the payload… Read more »

The Block: After The Love Has Gone…

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After all is said and done, what has happened on The Block NZ 2014 is no real surprise, given that a) it’s set in Auckland, b) it stars people from Auckland, and c) it thrives on the kind of festering cut-throat competition that exists in the modern era.  Of Auckland. Good old little Pt Chev eh?  Little old Pt Chev. … Read more »

MKR: Sudden Death of Food TV

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Sometimes I head up these blog posts about New Zealand reality television, and I get up from the computer and go to the bathroom and take a long hard cold look at myself in the mirror.  My inner monologue screams “Why do you waste precious life-hours watching this wasteland of crap?” There is no answer, for there is, no answer…. Read more »

The Block NZ – Knocked Around and Knocked Up

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In about July of this year, I did what bloggers sometimes do. I read an article in a newspaper (online, not even the paper version) and had a white, middle-class reaction to it. I then hopped on my blog and blogged up a story around it, having carried out none of my own research at all, and posted the blog…. Read more »