Monthly Archives: February 2015

Countdown Fusion

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    How can I be a capable, competent, semi-educated, semi-upright woman and be writing about a supermarket? Coz we all need supermarkets.  We all go to them. We all wander around with the small basket Vague Shopping and then crave a trolley because we are going to overspend. It’s important. When I go on Sunday nights, the dads are… Read more »

Location, location, location …

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Just before Coronation Street of a Friday is a show about home ownership, the current force/trend of western European history.  It’s no longer imperialism; it’s Location. In about 100 years’ time, there will be papers to take at university in modern history that will look very different to the papers I took, From the Treaty of Versailles to Pearl Harbour… Read more »

15 Minutes in the Kutchun: MasterChef 2015

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MediaWorks TV are now on the lookout for contestants for a rebooted MasterChef New Zealand. Simon Gault has announced he wouldn’t return leaving three positions available for fresh meat.  The recent media release speaks of judges who are ‘formidable’. I can’t for the life of me work out whether food in this country is being eaten or worshipped.  I recommend… Read more »

Mum’s Night Off

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The New Zealand Pork (guffaw) Board has released a website and print advertising along the lines of: “Yo.  Thick, only-good-for-pouring-concrete ‘blokes’.  Get into the kitchen and cook some eggs.  If you do, you will get brownie points, and possibly a chance of getting sex.  It will only be in the missionary position though, (partner looking at ceiling making mental shopping… Read more »

Gail Force

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  Gail Platt is everywoman. Think you’re not like her?  You are.  All women are, or become her at some stage. Who is she? She’s an oversexed llama at first glance.  She falls in deep, and lusts with all her heart. She likes the bad boys.  The ones with money and power.  She is easily fooled by the mail-order correspondence… Read more »

Will You Be My Valentine?

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  It’s Valentine’s Day on the weekend. And on the lists of New Zealand men: what they think women expect.  And sometimes get it so, so wrong. 1. Long-stemmed roses Hard to get.  The Warehouse does them. Expensive. Also bear in mind that it’s Saturday this year so you don’t need the big show of bouquets because no one is… Read more »

Man Buns

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  We all know what is meant by a man bun.  Every now and then, a confusing and polarizing fashion trend comes along and usually lands squarely on the face, arms, legs or some other body part of maledom. This time it’s the man bun. They were around circa 1991 at Soundgarden (Bad Motorfinger era) concerts, but the hair was… Read more »

Our First Home

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    A brand new multi-night series following three families as they put everything on the line to help their children onto the property ladder TVNZ has created a show for our times, and I am excited that it may open serious discussion around our obsession with home ownership. More interesting, though, is this show’s concept — that the parents… Read more »

Help for Insomniacs

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If you are at home tonight, saving yourself for the Big Waitangi weekend, you are not alone. I imagine that you, like me are sat in your living room, watching television and thinking it’s Friday when it’s just Thursday and cursing the day that long weekends were invented, such is the disruption to normal television viewing expectation. You are probably… Read more »